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Rudy Pankow is a familiar name for fans of Netflix’s Outer Banks. The actor, who has played JJ Maybanks since the show’s premiere, is not just part of one of the streamer’s top-rated shows, he’s also half of one of Netflix’s most talked about ships: Jiara, aka JJ and Kiara (Madison Bailey). And the actor has been open about the fact that the frenzy about his character has, at times, affected his personal life.

On Outer Banks, JJ is one of the Pogues – aka, the poor kids – the show follows as they seek treasure after treasure. At the end of Season 3 the treasure hunts finally pay off, and the Pogues: JJ, Kiara, John B., Sarah, Pope, and Cleo, end up with a significant treasure that in Season 4 we see them pool together to start a business and buy a property.

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Related: Who killed Wes Genrette in Outer Banks?

Also in Season 4, JJ finds out that he isn’t actually a Pogue, but a Kook – aka, the rich kids – as his mother was Larissa Genrette, the daughter of a wealthy landowner, Wes Genrette. Queue the identity crisis in Outer Banks Season 4, Part.

Interest in his character has led to a renewed interest in Pankow’s personal life, and that of course includes his relationships. But who is Rudy Pankow’s girlfriend? And why has the actor felt the need to call out social media behavior against her multiple times?

Who is Rudy Pankow from Outer Banks’ girlfriend?

Pankow has been dating Elaine Siemek. The two met on the set of Outer Banks, where Siemek worked as an assistant. She is also a photographer. They have been together since 2021, and though the two don’t really post about each other so much, the things they have posted have mostly been about defending their relationship.

Before the Outer Banks Season 4 premiere, Pankow briefly addressed his personal life in an interview with Cosmopolitan and referred to the fact that he felt the need to call out fan behavior towards his girlfriend when the two first started dating.

“I think a lot of people can intertwine a narrative and what they want to believe. And they take it out on someone that doesn’t deserve it,” Pankow said. “That’s unfortunate and it’s hard.”

“That’s why I spoke up — no one should go through something like that,” he added, going on to make a veiled reference to fans confusing the relationship his character has in the show with real life. “And that’s why social media is so tricky because sometimes it can enforce a narrative of a show as an actual narrative. For example, what we’re recording is meant to be consumed in the show. But some people might take it as literal.”

In 2021, when Pankow and Siemek first started dating, Pankow took to social media to call out trolls harassing her. “I’m here to call out the disrespect and harassment someone who I love dearly is getting on a daily basis,” he wrote, alongside a picture of the two.

“It has gotten to the degree where lies are being spread and accusations are being said that go beyond the normal ‘hate,’” he added. “Not only is she not what she is being accused of being, she is the complete opposite and actively is so. Accusing someone you don’t know of being abusive and manipulative is not ok, especially when you don’t know the relationship personally.”